arriving in Thailand
It started in December when I had finally overcome my indecision about taking this somewhat last minute trip. I had donated to Wikipedia and when I got the perk of their best photos of the year emailed to me, I saw two were taken in Thailand. The picture of the Phraya Nakhon Cave with it’s subterranean temple blew me away. I decided I had to go while I was here.
In Bangkok, my friend Jeff happened to arrive the same day and our two days exploring together provided a perfect launch pad for my first solo leg of the journey. Of course I was a little nervous about traveling alone, but at every step, any fear was quelled by the presence of a kind, friendly person who seemingly appeared just as I needed someone to talk to, go to dinner with, watch my bag while I ran to the bathroom, or share a car to a remote cave. In the past 24 hours alone I have met at least 8 intelligent, fun, genuine, open- hearted souls who invited me in or along. It’s been a very affirming experience of humanity.
This morning I set off for the cave with three German graduate students here for a trimester abroad. After an hour long car ride, a hike up and down two mountains with a stroll across a windy beach between them, we arrived at the temple in the cave I saw in the photo.
In today’s culture of digital enhancement, where we are always trying to capture things in their best light, it feels rare to be somewhere so much more impressive than a picture can convey. This cave, which has two large openings worn into the limestone that allows a variety of plants to grow and flourish, truly has a special and unique energy. It was magnificent, peaceful and awe inspiring, and as a lover of the English language, I do not use those words superfluously.
After walking around and taking photos, I climbed up the rock wall to the side of the temple and took it in. Sometimes I find it so silly to take photos I know I won’t look at of a sight captured by many better photographers with better equipment, but I suppose no one has stood in that spot on that day in that moment but me- whether it is the best spot or moment or camera or not. And now I have something to share with you, sweet friends.
In a culture where the spirituality is so overt and the local people’s engagement with it is so much a part of their daily lives, it has been easier for me to take moments to be mindful, even if that usually means just being aware my mind is full. Being away from home, when I catch myself thinking about work tasks ahead, problems behind or people not present, I can ask myself, what are you doing? None of that is here in this moment. What is here is the texture of the limestone on the many formations around me, the way the light reflects on the leaf of the tree, the musty smell of the rock I’m leaning on and the colors and curves of the ornate decorations on the temple in front of me as the light shifts around it.
Recently, I read “the job of the mind is not to be happy, it is to solve problems, which is why it always finds them.” Accepting & embracing the cliche of having realizations about life while traveling, I have enjoyed witnessing myself struggling to think ahead to the next part of my day because I have never been down that road or to that place so I have no idea how it will look. That means I can’t imagine it, ie not be present and call it ‘planning.’ I have reached out to a few generous friends who have been so kindly advising me, then when I move forward having the experience I had questions or concerns about, I have enjoyed watching things unfold in a way that has rendered all my fears or concerns useless. These truly are good lessons to bring home.
My first day, tired & jet lagged, I was surprised at how I contracted around the concept of travel. Ok, I have taken the long plane ride, I have spent and will continue to spend money while I sacrifice the time I could be using to earn more, I flew to the other side of the world where other humans live to see what the earth looks like here and what it’s like to be a human living here- but why? Yes, it’s nice to see and do things that are enjoyable, but why? What does it matter to the world if I enjoy myself? Why is this a worthwhile use of time and resources? It felt incredibly self indulgent and purposeless. I will continue to look at this, but my first impression is that the point is to go home better. Be more open minded, be more patient, present and grateful, to make the effort to actually get to new places where I live and have been saying, maybe I’ll go next week for 8 years. I’d love to be as curious and attentive as I am here about the road near my house that I have driven down 1,000 times, because never before have I driven that road at that moment on that day . Of course it’s all easier said than done, but the point of spending the money and expending the effort coming here is to touch that more present mindset, practice, and make a fundamental shift. When it fades, which it will, hopefully I can get away for another reminder.